Why Do People Stay in Bad Jobs?

Why Do People Stay in Bad Jobs? We’ve all been there. Jobs where you hate to get up in the morning, where Monday is a life sentence and Friday only a temporary reprieve. It can be bad for any number of reasons: a ruthless boss; a toxic work environment; boring assignments; or stupid company rules. The list can be endless and varied. Sapping Hope But one universal affects not only your work life but also your will to take action to get out of it: a bad job saps hope. Your boss, in word and deed, communicates that you are a miserable incompetent. Much as you might refute it, the contempt has crept into your psyche and makes you half-believe that nobody else would hire you. The toxic work environment has caught you in a web of constant back watching and heading off attacks so you forget other work places can be healthier. The boring or unsatisfying work dulls you so that your best is as little as you can get away with and you have no energy to find better work. Over time, your confidence and ability to take action to get out are drained. It is the most…

How to Combine Team and Career

How to Combine Team and Career In my post, When Not to Take One for the Team, YOU were told that you had to take one for the team by not attending a conference you really want. You might have felt that, in that post, you gave into your boss Gwen’s insistence too easily, but as I pointed out in Downsides of Refusing to Take One for the Team, you can pay a steep price for refusing to accept the decision if you stubbornly stick to your ‘right’ to go. But you might be able to get something of what you want while avoiding the negative feelings that emanate if you insist. Compromise Let’s return to the conversation. This is what happened when you were pushing for an all-or-nothing solution. Gwen: Still, if nobody volunteers, I think we have to go with whose work is least relevant. You: Well, I think it’s relevant but if you think that it’s right for the team… Here’s another way to take this. Gwen: Still, if nobody volunteers, I think we have to go with whose work is least relevant. You:  I was wondering if we could compromise. The conference is three days. Could…

Downsides of Refusing to Take One for the Team

Downsides of Refusing to Take One for the Team In the previous post, YOU made your case for going to an important conference but were overruled by the boss. But YOU might feel that you didn’t fight hard enough. You might be right—more argument might make a difference. However, you could win the battle but lose the war. Winning the battle but losing the war As I have mentioned in other posts, the pressure to get along within a team can be overwhelming. And from the manager’s or company’s point of view, that’s a good thing. A harmonious work environment is pleasant and assumed to be optimally productive. (This isn’t always true, of course—see my post Getting Along Can Do You In). But in order to create this harmony, everybody in the group has to implicitly agree not to rock the boat. Those who break that rule (like continuing to push going to a conference) are at least frowned upon, if not actively sanctioned. “That’s not fair!” I can hear you say. “People should not be punished for sticking up for themselves.” Absolutely right. However, the desire for harmony trumps almost everything else in the work place. What are the…

When Not to Take One for the Team

When Not to Take One for the Team As I covered in the previous post, taking one for the team, or putting yourself at a disadvantage in order to help, is often the right way to go. But sometimes, it isn’t. When to stick to your guns When this is very, very important to you and/or your career. Maybe you need to attend because you are actively scouting for a new job. Naturally, you can’t say that but you need to go. When you think it’s somebody else’s turn. You may already know that, for example, Tim has been to the conference every year for the last five. When you feel you are being unfairly pressured. It’s not as probable in the scenario I’ve laid out, but if you feel that you’re targeted, you may want to resist. How do you avoid volunteering? In the original scenario, your boss, Gwen, asked YOU, Tim, or Sacha to forego the conference. Let’s pick up the conversation from that point. Reprise Gwen: I was kind of hoping for a volunteer.   DO NOT be the first to speak no matter the length of the silence. The first to speak often puts himself into…

When to Take One for the Team

When to Take One for the Team As in life, people who never compromise, volunteer,  or take the wishes and needs of others into account—well, they might be successful but they surely aren’t popular in teams. And frankly, I doubt they are all that successful either. Purely pragmatically, it is in your best interest to be seen as someone who will put the good of the group ahead of your own wishes. From your own experience, I’m sure you know that your colleagues like you more and are therefore more likely to help out when you need it. In addition, a team where all members are willing to give and take is a good place to work, as well as (usually) more effective. We all want to have a job where we love to get into work—being a good team member can contribute to that environment. So when is the right time? There can be any number of right times, but here are some you might want to consider if we are talking about the previous situation where someone can’t go to a high-value conference. Others have not had the opportunity. You’ve already attended twice. Is there another team member who…